Asked by Anonymous
he gets angry. and we end up having fights about it a lot and i feel like i dont have to give him any reasons for not wanting to have sex, but he insists on solid reasons aka unless i would die from his penis, any argument i have is invalid. and its shitty you know, because we have fun, but he wants to get laid a lot and i just dont need/want it as much. and it hurts when you get called boring by one person you really care about. since he doesnt get any of this i considered getting a drink before we do it so id relax a bit or something because i really dont want to lose him but at the same time if i did it sober, i would hate myself for letting it happen against my will. i dont know what to do… its really shitty because i care about him a lot, and we have been together for a year and a couple of months, both 19… like, as far as i know, we should mutually enjoy this, and if we are not, then its destined to fail i guess
It sounds like your libidos are simply incompatible. Unless you guys are interested in having an open relationship (ie one where you both can seek sex from other people and still get your emotional/romantic needs met through each other as primary partners), this relationship is not sustainable. You’re really young, and if you don’t feel comfortable with him having sex with other women while still being your boyfriend, you guys should probably end it now so you don’t waste any more of your youth dating someone you’re not sexually compatible with.
This is a really, really gross answer.
Are you just going to ignore the fact that this guy is a sexually coercive abusive piece of shit? This is not an issue of “incompatible” libidos, this is an issue of this guy being a proto-rapist.
Answer to your abusive rapist boyfriend trying to coerce you into sex? Have an open relationship! It’s not his fault he’s a rapist! He just needs more sex! With other women! Why aren’t you allowing him to meet his needs?
Jesus Christ I used to think this blog was fine.
this guy is literally a rapist, yet she should consider an open relationship? are you fucking insane?
Leave him, leave him now. No one deserves to be in such an awful disgusting place with such an abhorrent person. He is so wrong to be doing that to you. I’m so sorry anon.
Please leave him. You may love him but he doesn’t love you. He doesn’t even treat you decently. You deserve so much better. Basically this person you’ve asked is saying that you should continue letting him hurt you and let him start hurting another woman. Please just leave him.
this kind of response was why I stayed with the dude who did this kind of shit to me for a long time and didn’t realize why I felt so violated by it until later
I still freeze up a lot because of it
This is exactly why I’ve been reblogging this thing for the whole day now. It’s so important that women know that they do have the right to say no, that they don’t have to ‘give in’. Because this is abuse and this is rape and nobody deserves that and everybody deserves this to be acknowledged and to have support.
Reader’s Bill of Rights
1. The right to not read
2. The right to skip pages
3. The right to not finish
4. The right to reread
5. The right to read anything
6. The right to escapism
7. The right to read anywhere
8. The right to browse
9. The right to read out loud
10. The right to not defend your tastes
let’s spend our week nights eating cereal on the floor
when there is a perfectly fine table behind us.
we can go to the movies and sit in the back row
just to make out like kids falling in love for the first time.
we’ll paint the rooms of our house
and get more paint on us than the walls.
we can hold hands and go to parties we end up
ditching to drink wine out of the bottle in the bathtub.
and slow dance with me in our bedroom
with an unmade bed and candles on the nightstand.
let me love you forever.
We all know the story. Virginal girl, pure and sweet, trapped in the body of a swan. She desires freedom but only true love can break the spell. Her wish is nearly granted in the form of a prince, but before he can declare his love her lustful twin, the black swan, tricks and seduces him. Devastated the white swan leaps of a cliff killing herself and, in death, finds freedom.